WEDNESDAY, 19 AUGUST 2015 —
This morning I woke up in a bit of a lethargic mood. I was gossiped out. Yes, you read that right! I was over-gossiped. I couldn’t possibly think of getting up and going to the gym. I woke up with my headphones in and my iPhone blaring some nasty alarm. I hate alarms, but without them, I would cease to be the type-A person you know today. I had a foul mood about all the stuff I talked over with Chris last night and the constant talking myself down after posting last night’s blog (“it’s not about me, it’s not about me”). For once, I gave myself a headache. How stupid.
I got a haircut this morning. Thank goodness! I love haircut days. I recently made the jump to a salon owner in town that has an Aveda-concept salon. I adore her! I adore the space and love that she lives and breathes this industry. I can’t stand booth rent salons that act like cheaper versions of SuperCuts. Booth renting is amazing when everyone is on the same page, but when people bring in their own chemicals, unmarked bottles and all charge differently for their services, it makes for a confusing environment for not only the guest, but the staff. It becomes a free-for-all. I can’t do it! Walking into Euphoria makes me happy. I hear the right music, smell the essential oils and am greeted with a great presence of professionalism and feel a mutual respect from the owner to me. I wouldn’t have it otherwise. I left after about half an hour in pure serenity and it seemed as though all of my headache and tension from the night before vanished! THAT’S IMPECCABLE service, by the way! To leave on cloud 9 means the stylist not only did their job, they went above and beyond!
Today when I arrived at the salon, I noticed my first guest was in a lethargic mood as well. She was having relationship problems today and I wanted to just sit and counsel her, but I knew in my heart she was needing some “internal” thinking time. Every time I come back from getting a haircut, I think about how Elizabeth makes things calm and makes me happy to be there and I’m excited to go back for my next cut, it rubs off and I want to be like that with guests and for the most part I think I do the same thing. There are times like today though when I can read the body language of someone and understand that I won’t be this client’s best friend or Oprah anytime soon… especially today. I rinsed my guest and sent her on her way and said, “I hope your day gets better.” She just kind of mumbled and moved on. I really meant it. I hope she’s alright.
Today was a bit frustrating at one point because I had some rather serious business to discuss with my assistant, but had no idea how to approach her or even the TIME to approach her. She is doing so well at the salon, but she works part-time. It’s hard to be young all by itself, but when you are building a life with someone, have a child and are looking to move on into the world on your own, you have to have full-time gigs, not part-time gigs. My biggest concern was that she may be leaving me and the salon. I have no idea where I got the notion that she was leaving, but when she told me she was looking for part-time work elsewhere, I may have come off very defensively with the following sentence: “whatever you do, it can’t compromise your hours at the salon.” I instantly put up a wall of defensiveness saying that to her. It wasn’t defense towards her, it was defense towards my own ego and comfort. I have grown so accustomed to having her there that I fear her leaving. We had a talk on the phone tonight and yes, she has taken another part-time gig, and no she is not leaving the salon. Not by any means is she leaving. I was comforted to know that, but I feel like I added to the stress in my own mind, by once again, over thinking. Truth be told, I don’t want Demetria to leave ever. She’s been my right hand for two and half years, it would be hard to train someone else, but eventually that time will come and she’ll move on to being a stylist either in my salon or taking on a position somewhere else with more perks. In the mean time, I want everyone happy and comfy. I can’t transition anyone right now, I’d flip! I already did at the thought last night.
Tonight, I came home and talked to Chris about my moment of crazy last night and told him I was a nut and sorry for being a nut and promised not to be a nut for another week or so. He just hugged me, gave me a kiss and had the look on his face with the realization that he may be marrying a nut one day….
I was reading some of my old blogs last night and realized I’m a huge gossip about my own life and thought about all the people that ask about my life on a daily basis. “What’s new, Josh?” they ask…
“Oh, nothing. Always busy; always working.” I say back.
What a fucking lie! They read the blogs! They see the tweets, they follow on Facebook. “Oh. Nothing. Always writing about me and my neurosis” should be my answer…
But then again, they already know that.
As I sit here now and listen to Madonna in my earbuds, I realized I flipped out a bit because I don’t want to change, but I do, there’s those conflicting feelings I was blogging about yesterday. At the same time, I want new blood in my life. I need some new friends, some new interns, someone to train with Demetria and learn how to do her job for the moment when she moves on, moves up into a stylist position full-time or god forbid, leaves me.
There goes that neurosis again… when I tell you I’m just busy at the salon and have NOTHING going on, just kick me in the ass next time, will ya?