a year in my life

Late Night Tuesday: My Date With A Girl Named “Pinot”

TUESDAY, 25 AUGUST 2015 — 

Last night turned into one glass of pinot noir after another glass of pinot noir with a vodka soda on the side.  Who the fuck do I think I am? I mean, really? Who drinks this sloppy? A twenty-one year old, yes, but I am a man in my thirties and that’s not a wise thing to do with almost nothing in my belly.  I ate breakfast yesterday, but by the time Chris met me at the wine bar, it was nearly 8pm and i had been sitting there talking to my friend since 5:30.  That’s gross, Josh!  That’s just gross drinking. At about 8:30, Chris asked me, “have you been here since you got out of work?”

I sipped my drink and shot him some puppy eyes over my glass.

If I were my own child, I’d spank me.  That’s enough wine, Joshua!

For some odd reason I was in celebration mode.  Chris and I have been together for ten months and every 24th I cutely tell him “happy -versary” and insist on celebrating.  Well, Chris is not the avid drinker I am and last night I thought polishing a whole bottle of wine inside and out was the way to celebrate.

At one point, I remember checking Facebook to see who has unfriended me and accidentally stumbled upon some blocking.  You can always tell when someone blocks you on Facebook because when someone tags a group of individuals, all their names are bold and then oddly enough, someone’s is in non-bold print.  That non-bold person is generally some mother fucker that blocked you.  I have no problem with blocking because sometimes you need a break from the Facebook and the annoying people that inhabit it, but I just want to know what the fuck I did! That made me oddly sad and my friend felt bad for me. Any other day I wouldn’t give a shit, but last night I did.  I even started crying talking to Chris about family and friendships gone sadly tragic.  I don’t do stuff like that.  Pinot Noir was not on my Friends List this morning and I was not “liking” it.

I woke up this morning feeling just fine.  No red wine hang over, nothing.  I do remember coming home though and trying to make hamburgers with a pound of butter.  Yuck! Again, what the fuck, Joshua? I looked at Chris laying in bed and thought to myself, “I didn’t do anything wrong at all last night, but I got a little twisted.  That’s a bit much for a Monday night!” I felt gluttonous. I also felt like I was celebrating some invisible party Chris was not invited to.  I don’t know if I’ll be having Pinot Noir for awhile.  Last night, it was like elixir from the nipple of Venus; this morning, it felt like the residual effects of a roll in the hay with Lilith. I had too much of a guilty temptation.  My made it my story to my first guest this morning, it seemed to entertain her. I was listening as I was speaking out loud and thought once again: glutton.

Tonight, Chris and I came home after nearly 12 hour work days for both of us. I had picked up Indian food so we could relax at home since I decided to celebrate last night alone with a reservation for two.  I sat in one seat and my date Pinot sat across from me.  I was looking forward to a good dinner last night and so I thought I’d pick up where I had intended to venture last night and surprised a very exhausted Chris with our “Happy -Versary” aloo saag and samosas.

Today at work I had a great interview with a two-year stylist that I want to bring on as a member of my team at some point. We’re going to work together in the salon in a six-week training program and see if this is a good fit for her.  I really like her and want to build her confidence! Chris met her today and thought her make-up was on fucking point.  I have known her for years and know this girl has the talent and I can see a spark in her a lot of people have disregarded and tried to blow out. I want her to know I’m on her side.  I want her to know I want her to succeed and make lots of money and be a successful colorist.   I know she has what it takes and I know I’m the one to show her! I was so energized after she left.  She’ll start in September shadowing and training and we’ll take it from there.

As I sat at the bar at Mr. Tandoori’s tonight waiting for our to-go order, I looked at my phone and turned on Facebook and exited out of that app quickly. Why was I so sad last night? Oh yeah! I have friendships ending. I looked in my inbox and evidently, “Pinot” and I sent someone a Facebook message saying: “we’re not friends anymore clearly.”

Yes. Pinot Noir, you’re unfriended.

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