a year in my life

Monday Night: Skip The Gym, Mentor A Friend


I woke up this morning and meditated knowing I was not even going to attempt to go to the gym.  I love the gym I attend, but they tend to close for bullshit reasons like bank holidays and for grand opening parties.  I have walked my happy ass up the road many times to find a note on the door of this gigantic building saying they won’t “be open today” or have abbreviated hours.  I don’t understand it.  Health fanatics like my sister will tell you it doesn’t matter if its Christmas, there’s always training to do! (She’s insane though)  I am the furthest from a gym bunny, but in an effort to create good habits, I enter every last morsel into my Weight Watchers app and make an effort to hit the gym.  When I can’t button my Armani jeans, I like to tell the manager at the front desk it’s her fault cos they wanted to observe Labor Day.  As I passed the gym on the way to the salon this morning, I saw lights on and people inside.  Okay, so I just wanted to be lazy…

Today went really well in the salon.  I took on the mission of mentoring another stylist in town.  I want her to be happy in her salon home and I want her to be successful. I also want her to form some confidence so she can begin booking MORE clients. She is truly a natural talent!  She has the talent, but I feel like a little confidence boost would push her forward and it could become very profitable for her.  I want her to enjoy the financial liberties I was able to take advantage of three years into doing hair.  I knew a decade ago that I would get to comfortable point by becoming a successful colorist.  I used to have people tell me I was not gifted and that I was not someone people liked.  It hindered my ability to make friends in the work place and so now I walk into the salon with a frozen bitch-face that even 103 degree weather can melt.  I refuse to be torn down in a salon ever again and I really believe that my friend is receiving the same treatment I received a decade ago.

As she walked in, I knew today was going to be amazing! I knew she was going to be a sponge because there is no way a person with a license of two years is going to walk in and want to shadow a senior colorist unless they are choosing to.  At two years in, the average cosmetologist is trying to build, double-booking when they shouldn’t, making mistakes and either gets torn down at the critique of his or her peers or says “Fuck you” and shows them what a bad ass they are in their third year when they actually develop a signature style and very very predicable habits.  My challenge is to take all my energy and instill it in her and catch her up to this point.  I want to see her style! I want to see her individuality! I want to see her become a successful, sought-after colorist! I want everything I have for her.

After our afternoon of going over salon policies and learning foiling techniques, we went to lunch and we spent a very nice moment talking.  The ice breaker has already been addressed since we’ve been friends before she even expressed to me that she would like more training.  I love the act of breaking bread with friends over lunch.  It’s so important to me that bonds are formed.  I know I make jokes about the frozen little heart I have or my bitch-face, but I want to influence others in a positive way.  I don’t want someone to walk into work with that chip on their shoulder.  That chip is a defense mechanism.  I would never have to walk in like that if I had been treated properly at my first salon.  I believe that bullying and tearing people down leads to the success of the person you’re tearing down.  Every time you talk shit and take a piece of time to give someone hell and mock them instead of building them up, you give them a bit of the power you misused in this world.  I refuse to be this person.

As I walked home with Chris after work, I saw the lights on in the gym.  Fuckers… I thought you were closed.


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