a year in my life, diary, living well, luxelove

Erev Shabbat: Apps vs Old-School.. How much is too much?

Friday, 29 January 2016 — 1:45 am

I received quite a few messages via social media today.  It was kind of overwhelming actually.  I don’t tend to interact a lot on social media direct messaging apps.  I would much rather people contact me directly.  I did receive word today from Wade.  I’ll probably be back to comedy in March.  The February comedy line-up has already been confirmed. When it comes down to scheduling, it can be incredibly difficult to get me to commit to anything as my schedule is already 90% locked in for the next eight weeks.  I’m kind of bummed, but I’m not worried.  This gives me a month to be inspired for more material when I return in March (hopefully).

I’ve been reading Aziz Ansari’s book Modern Romance.  He is so little comedian and more researcher in this book.  He and his writing collaborator brought together focus groups and interviewed people about dating, marriage and soul mate kinda stuff.  When he asked folks in a retirement home why they got married, they all just kind of said, “that’s just what you did then.”  A lot of women said that they got married just to get out of their parents’ homes.  How sad is that? My parent’s generation that came next were a bit more direct about dating.  The average rate of asking someone out was the second or third time you saw someone.  In the age of Tinder, I don’t think kids do that anymore.  I was never an internet dater. I used to call or ask people out directly and they would look at me like I was a nut.  I never talked through the computer to date.  It’s just not my thing.  The first chapter of his book ends with a portion all about people being glued to their phones.  Did you know the average American spends 7.5 hours in front of a screen (be it phone, tablet, laptop)? That’s insane! If you ask me, I think that’s just how things are done now. We have mobile computers.  They are not phones.  They are computers.  This Jetsons world we live in has made us very dependent on our mobile devices.  7.5 hours seems like a lot! 

This week, I tackled my desk.  I know that under the large amount of papers with 2015 dates printed on them that it was probably time to file them.  In an effort to transform my office, I have looked at the empty shell of the room we no longer use and have realized the best thing do to is to purge a lot of stuff.  I need an area for filing and keeping files, but overall, that room could be used for Chris to work on wigs and drag outfits and for me to write and work on whatever creative word-y project I’m concocting.  I’ve reached an era in my work world where I can take care of most of my paper work throughout the week at work.  January has been a real bust getting back on track! Restocking retail, catching up on filing, reconciling some 2015 bills has left me looking at the calendar asking, “Where did January go?”

It’s 2am and Chris is closing at the bar and helping restock.  He loves that job.  He loves his bosses at The Senate.  They’ve had a lot of press lately.  This week, they were in the paper with a feature article and tonight I saw Ken on the news talking about The Superbowl.  It’s incredibly heartwarming to see the bar doing amazing.  I am so proud of them!  Chris woke me up before he left for the bar earlier tonight.  We had a really calm night at home.  We ate some Broccoli-Cheese frozen entree from Amy’s.  I have to tell you: falling asleep on my bubs lap beat the shit out of grabbing cocktails.  I have all the time in the world for cocktails this weekend after I host Fasching.

As I sat up reading Aziz’s book, I was reading what these people told him about love.  They “had” to get married.  They “grew” to love one another.  I don’t ever feel like that with Chris.  I didn’t use Tinder to find him, we didn’t build our life being focused on the internet.  We texted a lot, we still do. We call each other a lot through out the day, but the best communication comes when we’re together.  I have never relied on an app to interact.

In a world full of internet apps and instant access to everything where people spend what should be an entire work day clocked-in on their phones, I’m really very happy reading my books and writing my little blog.  My connections in this world are not based on the internet.  Real communication for me is face-to-face, emoji-less and more meaningful.  The internet is a place to promote the blog and the salon, but I don’t want to live in this 7.5 hour screen time world.  I’d be happy clocking in at 6 hours.  Sounds like a good even number to me and less addictive… Maybe that’s just me.


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