Sunday, 3 July 2016 —
I felt rather emotional today as I looked at my phone to see messages from a couple of my friends. Its very funny how friendships mold into family units of themselves. In my thirties, I have realized that friendships DO become tight like the girls on Golden Girls, the people on Friends or the slutty women on Sex and the City and we live and work and breathe and shit and tell each other about living, working, breathing and shitting. It’s all very fun til one of us breaks up or gets divorced or gets cancer or falls off the deep end emotionally. Today, my brain got the best of me and I had my moment of tears and happiness and grand resolve about many internal battles in my own personal life. I feel like sometimes we ALL mirror each other and it gives us a chance to look at our own lives, but people like me tend to overthink and overanalyze. Boo to that! I love my friends and want everyone to be calm and happy and have tea parties in nature and dress in angelic white satin well-fitted Armani shirts and countdown the moments when we see rainbows every time we blow a fart, but until then, real life reels me in and bitch slaps me from time to time. Today, Sunday, was one of those days.
I went to lunch with Chris today at Rosario’s and enjoyed a salad and some spaghetti. We had the trainee waiter today and generally I don’t complain about the staff there, but this one was just a yutz. I hope he learns how to relax. Chris caught the hostess kissing her boyfriend the busboy and that ruined his Cosmopolitan. After a couple of glasses of wine and listening to some morbidly obese people whine about the service, we got our ticket and went off to the grocery store and laughed and poked fun at people. Maybe this world is perfect and only Chris and I are the bitches critiquing it to pieces! Who knows! Maybe they talk about us. That’s okay. I hope they all laugh as hard as we do.
This past week has been rather social for Chris and me. We’ve been to Andy Mac’s a couple of times with two different girlfriends. Both of them drink beer and have mouths like sailors. I love it! When I went up to the bar for another round, a gentlemen stopped me and asked me why we haven’t had any comedy at Andy Mac’s lately. I said, “Ask Levi”. Levi replied, “I’ve tried. Believe me.” There’s some conflict with ownership or business partners or something, but it seems as though my favorite venue has no intention of having comedy shows there. I’m rather bummed and do not want to go back in the local open mic scene. I’m sorry, but I’m too good for this open mic scene. I feel like I need a one hour show of my own or a one-man show or something. I’m not about to ask to be an opener for one of these half-wits locally and I refuse to be non-paid or slipped a $20 like some jughead that writes all day in my mom’s basement, smokes weed and jacks off for entertainment and then talks about those things on a mic expecting laughs. I’m not the typical Pueblo, male comedian. That’s all they talk about. They bash women and gay men and try their damnedest to keep both of those groups down. It’s nonsense really. I remember when they all were chum-chummy with Wade when he was here and didn’t utter a word to me. Things have not changed. Sadly, my wingman is no longer here. I can’t book a gig, can’t get a phone call back, can’t depend on people to reply to messages or admit I have honest, amazing talent. These folks are officially the meanest sons-a-bitches I’ve worked with or associated with. I don’t want to support their shows or call them colleagues. They’re a bunch of non-society wannabe bros that think a 40 buck gig is “MAKING IT”. No, I won’t be subpar, I won’t be a Pueblo comedian. I won’t be part of this nasty, bottom feeding, joke-stealing prejudice little group.
I had a talk today about insulting conduct and internet etiquette and for a split second thought about opening a Snapchat account. I don’t know what was pulsing through my body today except that I have been incredibly numb this year when it comes to the internet. I have a friend that is separated from her other half and he has deleted and unfollowed all of my social media, but he is still following Chris. I wasn’t angry about it, but I thought to myself, “when did I ever stop being his friend?” I told Chris, “I’m just a connection he doesn’t want to have right now”. It’s all very weird. Do I text him and ask him how he’s doing? Do I dare get nosey and see if he’s okay? Would this make my friend upset? What do we do? What do I do? I miss the social etiquette of writing letters and receiving phone calls. I don’t think sending flowers is appropriate for this situation? What should my little Barefoot Contessa/Martha Stewart heart do?
This past two weeks has been busy in the salon, my head is wrapped around leaving for Florida. My friends mean so much to me and I want the best for all of them. Today, I was talking to Chris about accepting blessings and being thankful and I told him I was thankful for him and believed in him. I am thankful for my friends, their spouses (or soon to be exes) and respect them all. This world is too chaotic to be worried about little stuff like comedy gigs. I’m off to a new gig with an international company. No 40 buck gigs for me, no sulking, no wondering why I can’t get a call back for a local comedy booking. I’m moving on into the future with my friends, my bubs and my family. Label.m here I come, Rockstars and Lambs in tow, a slew of new Facebook Live videos, blogs and focusing on my talents in an international/larger market.