a year in my life

Sunday Afternoon: “Healthy” Eaters, Food Authorities and Storylines

Sunday, 14 August 2016 —

I had a really nice FaceTime session with my mom this afternoon regarding my birthday.  She said her head hurt today, so I’m rescheduling Sunday lunch with her for Tuesday evening.  We’re going to try a new Italian place in town.  Supposedly, they make their own pasta and have authentic dishes.  It always cracks me up when people try to tell me about what is “really” Italian cooking and what is authentic.  I think people forget that Spaniards have a close connection to the Italians.  There’s a lot of Eurocentric blogs that talk about the Spaniards and the Italians being “cousins” and frankly, I would agree.  I would agree that almost any culture could be related to any other culture.  I draw on similarities between people, not what makes us different.  I grew up eating pasta on Sundays and made sauce and making pasta and was raised very Mediterrenean even though my dad is just your classic American “white guy”. His uncle Bill was Sicilian and he brought a lot of life to my dad’s  side of the family.  When I tell people my uncle Bill was Sicilian, they think they have me all figured out.  By marriage, folks.  Only by marriage.  I’m not Italian by blood line at all.  My mom loved rustic Italian cooking and I grew with that, but a lot of Spanish homes tend to have Italian and Arabic leanings in their cuisine.  Think of being an Arabic Jew during the Inquisition.  Your tastes are bound to get muddled.  That’s me. Muddled, Mediterranean and I love it all. I’ll be a judge of what’s Italian for myself, thank you though.

Instagram is trying to be Snapchat these days with “storylines” and I’m totally getting into it.  I’m glad I’m not on Snapchat though.  I can’t add another thing to my mobile life.  I will share with you though that the Facebook timelines lately are shit! People are really fucking annoying on Facebook.  If I see another single person complain about being single, another baby mama bash her baby daddy or another gay guy talk about how bitchy his friends are or how he is NOT a slut, I will fucking be checking Facebook twice a week.  But more than anything the posts that bother me the MOST are NOT political or any of the above, it’s a health freaks that bother me!  Mr. and Mrs. Organic, Sir and Madam Amy’s frozen meals and canned food and Duke and Duchess Free Range meets Crossfit. I can’t stomach your grass fed bullshit!  Shut up! We all want to eat healthy.  I eat full fat butter from Finland and drink Veuve Cliquot champagne when I feel fancy.  Chris and I favor vegetarianism and kosher eating in our house (until a cheeseburger rears it’s little head into our psyches after a busy day).  All these “look at what I eat” pics and post are the new Vitamin Cottage versions of dick pics.  I’ll tell you what I think of your pics… think the same as a paparazzi penis shot: I’m gonna look, I’m gonna make fun of you, I’m gonna tell everyone and I’m gonna blog about it and use it in comedy routines and roll my eyes every time someone mentions you and your vegetable (dick) pics.  Shut up already!  I don’t want to see you do push ups or see your menu or a spoon sticking out a can of “organic” Amy’s refried beans.  No one gives a shit… in fact, in all becomes shit in the end. So shut up!

Between all the social media living,  “The Best of Pueblo” votes are all sent in.  This year, they have went back to organic tracking as opposed to their previous years of voting as many times as you want in a single day.  I find it so unfair that some places just have their assistants and support staff stand at the front desk computer and keep voting for themselves.  I think I may have a chance this year of being shortlisted once again.  I will tell you why: the first two years, organic votes were counted and I was shortlisted both years and won.  This stuff the ballot box with NO limit of votes – campaign that last two years just allows sleazy voters to keep voting for themselves.  I don’t vote for my self.  I really couldn’t do that (its a little too ego for me), but I did send out a “for your consideration” post on Facebook and Instagram.  I’m back in the running this year as far as I’m concerned. Last year was a horrible year, I certainly didn’t make The Pueblo Chieftain ad department very happy last year with my expose blog regarding “Best of Pueblo”.  With tons of nasty emails and internet threads about my blog, I would have thought I’d be shortlisted, when in fact, I was blacklisted.  I knew I was officially blacklisted when the publisher quit seeing me for her haircuts.  Oh well, let’s move on folks.

This week should be interesting. It’s very busy in the salon and I have a ton of office work to tend to.  I would love a social life.  One of my clients “lectured” me about the necessity of taking vacations.  I wanted to ask her if she read the last blog.  I’m working on it, lady! Gimme a moment to schedule that out… after I get done complaining about “healthy” eaters and social media though.



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